For most of us, this picture is our mind. Some call it brain noise. Some religious groups refer to it as the devil. Counselors diagnose it as the unconscious. Shrinks peg it as the ego. However the term that I prefer to use is Critical Inner Voice (C.I.V.) or Ego.
You know what I mean. That “voice” in your head that’s non stop all day and possibly throughout the night. I know it second guesses everything I try to decide on. Then when I do decide on something? The C.I.V. presents another choice or another scenario. Then that makes me have doubts about the original choice I made because, after all..”If it was the right choice to begin with then why would other options present themselves afterwards?”
Or it loves to judge and argue and show others how “special” I am because I have a different perception on something. It motivates me, in a very sneaky and stealthy way, to “prove” myself. It has me thinking I need to “defend” my ways and views. It can lead me into a false sense of security by accumulating “stuff”. The latest electronic gizmos, gadgets, toys, accessories, properties, books, knowledge…. blah, blah, blah, and more blah. The absolute worse it can and WILL do….make me believe that I am THAT….. my Critical Inner Voice is my actual identity.
Now you can’t blame me. I, along with the collective (everyone else on the planet), was raised to believe this. However, many are starting to realize this is not the case. We’re not this meat sack of flesh (with no disrespect to our 3-D bodies–they need love too) containing a “soul”, “energy body”, “being”, _______(insert believe system). Our C.I.V. will always put our flesh/brain in first place mode, first and foremost. It wants to make it the center of our universe.
There lies the rub. Back in cave man days we used the C.I.V./Ego for basic survival mode. “MMMM..me hungry.” Then the primitives would go pick berries. “MMMMM…me thirsty.” They would drink from a stream. “MMMMM…EEEKKK!” They start running from the T-Rex about to eat them. Over the years dinosaurs no longer existed. Our Egos needed other things to occupy it’s mind. Thus, judgement, criticism, second guessing and self importance became only a few of the many tools/toys created to distract the collective from that one truth… we are NOT our mind/body with a soul inside of it. It’s the other way around. We ARE light bodies/souls with a body.
Light Bodies = Energetic Bodies using the 3-D body as a vehicle.
Where does the C.I.V./Ego fit within this paradigm? The 1960’s and 70’s movements pushed the ideas that by eliminating the voices in our heads all of our problems could be solved and enlightenment attained. They insisted we had to be sitting in the lotus position to show how we were really dedicated to the spiritual path and eventually rewarded by having no Ego/C.I.V. at all! No wonder everyone is dazed and confused. That is just not possible. Wake up and give up that whole enlightenment B.S.!!!
I learned through teachings and good ole’ trial and error it’s not about erasing my C.I.V./Ego. The Ego is part of the hard wire in our brain. As referred to before, it’s our survival mechanism with one purpose only….protection at no expense. So I’m learning it’s about ACCEPTING the fact I do have an Ego/C.I.V. that’s a part of me as much as my right arm is a part of my body. And out of that acceptance I have found that instead of buying into and being distracted by the “brain noise’ of life, it’s about observing that “brain noise” and possibly learning how it’s not my True Self. My True Self FEELS from my Heart. It’s my feelings that discern my journey’s decisions as I move forward. Not the ramblings of my C.I.V./Ego. Referring to the picture above….I’m not all of those balloons, as my C.I.V. would have me believe. They’re distractions from acknowledging the truth.
By paying 100% attention to putting one foot forward at a time, being totally present, and using my Heart’s intuition, all the while accepting the “brain noise” for what it is….well maybe some day I’ll have only one balloon left. And then I can make a balloon animal.
Circus music please.